Thursday, August 29, 2013
If you're going to resurrect stars from our past, have the decency to go all out. Dig up Johnny Cash. Boil his preserved remains until the tender meat falls off the bone like a medium rare prime rib and make a stew from the broth. Strip the flesh off of a pig and zip-tie it onto the cleaned bones and tattoo a "13" on his fucking neck. Cram that Japanese voice-simulating robot into his face. Hammer hooks into his wrists, attach strings, and make him dance like a marionette.